Silly Subtle Stuff {1}

So i’m trying to take Cailin’s advice in her comment on my last post, where she says:

I try not to let a day go by…or a thing he does slip by without telling him what it did for me…or how happy it/he makes me….

And i figure that has to start with paying more attention to the way things already are.  Since, you know, i let that whole “He ties me to the bed” thing get by me as a Dominant act, i thought i should notice more.

So today, i was cleaning up the kitchen and cleaned out the frig, throwing away some left-over carryout that neither of us was going to eat.  It filled my garbage can – the under the sink garbage can.  So ~

~ you thought i was going to say “i took the garbage out,” didn’t you?  But no.  i have a rule.  i’m not allowed to take the garbage out, only Sir can take the garbage out.

i don’t know why.  It’s not a new rule, it’s been there ever since He moved in a couple of years ago.  i can nudge Him ~ for example, i might say, “i was thinking about taking out the garbage before i go to bed tonight,” and He’ll say, “No you’re not.” or “You better not!”  and take it out himself.   We both know what i’m doing, but He’s fine with that.

i’m not allowed to take it to the street or bring the cans in either.  He does that.  And He does it on His time schedule (and the pick-up people’s schedule), not necessarily when i think He should.

So that’s one that i obey all the time, and don’t think about anymore, except today, when i had this dilemma while He was at work.  i couldn’t leave it because i had more that needed to go.  So i texted Him.

Yes, i texted my Sir to get permission to take the garbage out.

“If you must…” he replied.  So i did.

It’s very strange, isn’t it?


9 thoughts on “Silly Subtle Stuff {1}

  1. faithfulreader2

    Cailin’s advise is so very important and I do that too.. and it DOES make a big difference.
    I can’t wait to continue to hear your observations. I think you will be amazed at how much he does really Dom you if you look for it.


    PS- That garbage thingy would make me crazy though.. .cause I hate garbage in my house, but then again so does Master so I wouldn’t have to worry. I had a recycled yogurt container and put it on his kitchen counter. I turned around and he was out the door putting it outside already. See why I love this man 🙂

  2. hispetitelle

    I love that. We all have these things around us that are between us, but we don’t realize they have any dominant aspect to them. My husband won’t let me wash his clothes. I actually have to ask permission to wash anything if his. It’s not that I’ve ever messed up his laundry by putting a red sock in with white clothes. If I only have half a load of dark clothes I will ask him if he has any and then he will go and get his clothes and finish that load of laundry. Conversely, when we got new dressers I cleaned his out and rearranged everything and he was thrilled that I did that.

    1. sofia Post author

      O, that’s interesting, Elle. i guess it makes sense, if you’re going to be dominant, you might as well have the little things work the way you want. 🙂

      1. hispetitelle

        He won’t give a reason as to why he has this rule (which was in effect for years before D/s), but it used to drive me crazy and more than likely, therein lies the reason. It’s a way of making me let go of control. I have a little obsession with laundry in that I have to make sure everything is sorted and washed properly.

  3. monkey

    Just yesterday I had a conversation with David about how my “wanting more” always seems to coincide with the end of the adjustment period of a new rule or set of rules. Becoming comfortable, it’s the subbies curse. It was a major revelation to me, he was very “but of course”. I think I need to update my list and carry it around to read in those hungry for more moments. 🙂


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