Seiza Revisited

Last night, Sir told me very clearly that when He had asked me to show Him the Japanese sitting posture the night before, He had not intended for me to do something that hurt me.

O, i know!  i know that!

Then why did i do it?  did i not know it was going to hurt?   Hadn’t i tried it when He’d told me to research the position?

O.  Um, no, i hadn’t.  And i kind of didn’t know it would hurt, i wasn’t sure.  i thought maybe it wouldn’t, or maybe it wouldn’t hurt a lot.

Do i think i’m through with my research?

Well, yes, Sir… i guess i think i am.

Really?  Aren’t there other ways to sit in Japanese culture?   Have i found a way that’s comfortable for me?  Is there a position i can get into gracefully, without it being painful?

Um, yes, Sir, no, Sir, no, Sir, not really.

Don’t i think it would be a good idea, since i like to sit at His feet, do be able to do that comfortably?

Um, yes, Sir.

What makes me think the seiza will be the answer?  Have i ever tried sitting with a bolster between my thighs and calves to ease the pressure on my knees?  No?  What makes me think the seiza will help?  Have i considered the zabuton?  Or the zafu*?

Um.  Um, no, Sir.   No, no, i don’t know.  No.  No.

Gentle, but relentless.  The message is clear.  i have half-assed my assignment.  {My words, not His.}

i feel ~ not ashamed ~ i feel a little foolish.  i wish i had done a more thorough job.  Wish i had tried the position before He told me to.  Wish i’d looked at other possibilities before i *decided* He needed to make a seiza.

i feel the weight of His disappointment, and i’m not pleased with myself.

It makes me wonder how many other things i’m half-assing and nobody’s noticed yet.

He spanked me last night, with the belt.  He started out light, and interspersed harder licks with more gentle ones, so it was pleasure not punishment.   He said it was to help me sleep, and it did.

This morning, i feel a bit chastened, but ready to do better.

And ~ the rest of the story ~ this turns me on.  It turns me on that He’s right, and that He called me on not doing a thorough job.  i think that’s how i know this is a D/s relationship and not just kink.

*************************

*Here’s a zafu, in case you were wondering:

Camel-sitting-cushion-kneeling1

P.S.  i know i’m years behind answering comments too, and i promise i’ll catch up someday.  i love your comments, and feel bad that i’m so far behind… and will try to do better on that too.  After i research sitting some more.  ❤

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11 thoughts on “Seiza Revisited

  1. vanillamom

    It must have been “pull your sub up short” day. It feels “good” even though it’s embarrassing. I love your Sir.

    nilla

    Reply
  2. monkey

    It must be going around. I’m sitting here (ooh, sitting) in my metaphorical corner “until I am ready to deal with you”. It is embarrassing.

    Reply
    1. monkey

      I can’t be the only one that sees definite get your squirm on possibilities in the “zafu” with a firm little cushion? 🙂

      Reply
  3. jadescastle

    Yay for the spanking. Boo for feeling foolish, even though we all need that sometimes, i think. The reminders of who decides that a job is completed or completed well. Good luck on your homework. i wish i had some good ideas.

    Reply
    1. sofia Post author

      Wordwytch!! If you wondered about it, you could have said something! lol… oh, well. i guess it was already too late.

      Reply

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