Is that an oxymoron?
Jz’s Scholarly Professor asks the question:
can you be a heartless bitch and a sub?
and Jz considers it in her post here.
And i’m pondering it. My first thought is noooooo, it just wouldn’t work. i imagine Heartless Bitch Sub (HBS) submitting to a spanking and then thinking, “Oooooh, you’ll pay for that someday!” Or telling her Dominant, “Fuck you ~ I’m through with you ~ I was just using you to indulge my submissive side by doing everything you wanted to please you, but I’m tired of that shit! No, don’t start crying ~ I don’t care!!” And that makes me giggle.
Oh, whoops, does that make me HBS? No, seriously, would she even be submissive then?
But that’s only one way to think about what being the HBS would look like. What does being a heartless bitch really mean?
Hell, I don’t know. I guess it’s someone who puts her own needs before everyone else’s? Who doesn’t care how her actions affect others? Who doesn’t feel compassion or sympathy for others?
I mean, no one’s like that all the time with everybody, at least I don’t know anyone who is. Oh, ok, I guess the guy who kidnapped those women and kept them locked up for 10 years. But I bet there are people who would tell you what a great guy he was. Well, not anymore, but before he got caught, probably.
So then I get lost in philosophic musings about all kind of things. Refocus – back to the question. Submission – HBS – is it possible?
Is caring an essential component of submission?
Hell, I don’t know. I think you can be a “bottom” and not be a caring person (whatever that means.) And I guess you could be tremendously approval seeking and be submissive in order to get those needs met without giving a damn about anything except getting your fill of approval for being submissive?
Is that what it would look like? Just being on a quest for the “good girl,” not being compassionate for anyone outside of the D/s relationship? What do youall think? Do you know an HBS?